Monday, April 16, 2012

Someday, I'll be the best mom ever

New Year's Eve
- I promise to let you stay up until midnight, make lots of noise, and drink sparkling cider to your little heart's content. I will also make them clean up all the confetti the next day to teach you responsibility, you little buggers. When you're a teenager, I'll help you throw a party. 

Valentine's Day
- I promise to let you get the coolest Valentines to give to your class. I also promise to buy the best candy for the Valentine's party. I'll do what your grandma did for your dad, and wake you up with a basket of chocolate at the foot of your bed. 

St. Patrick's Day
- I promise to not forget this holiday. You will NOT be pinched at my fault. I will remind you to wear green. I will also serve you an awesome breakfast of your choosing (anything green you want, or Lucky Charms). 

Last day of school
- I promise we will go to the beach. I promise to let you toss your old school papers into the awesome bonfire that your dad will build. I also promise that your summer vacations will be worthy of bragging. 

4th of July
- I promise this day will be full of swimming and hot dogs and watermelon. I promise to take you to the best firework show around. We will host or go to a barbeque every year, unless of course we are on an awesome vacation. 

Summer Vacation
- I promise to not let you watch TV. You'll hate this when you're little, and thank me when you're older. You can go to music camp, lifeguard training, swim lessons, library programs, girls camp/scout camp, or almost any other summer camp. You little smartie, you. (Dad says, "you smart little fart").

First day of school
- I promise to take your picture every year, even when you're a teenager. If this embarrasses you, I will take the picture at home, where no one can see. You do not have a choice. I will make sure you are equipped with the supplies and books you need, and that your outfit is super stylish. I will never forget to pick you up. 

- I will let you choose your own costume (as long as it is within certain guidelines, which we shall discuss later). I will take you trick-or-treating in the ritziest neighborhoods, and take you to your friends' parties. I'll even help you throw a party if you want. When you come home after trick-or-treating, I will do what my mom did for me: give you 10 baggies (my mom only let me have 5), and let you fill each baggie with 5 pieces of whatever candy you want. You can have a baggie per day until it is gone. My mom used to take the leftover candy and give it to the trick-or-treaters who came by later. I will not do this. I will save it for movie nights, sleepovers, potty training rewards, and good behavior. 

- I promise to do turkey crafts with you, such as the hand turkey and the construction paper head-dress. I will not tell you "no" if you want 2 slices of pie, or want a whole can of cranberry sauce to yourself. 
Christmas Eve
- I promise you can decorate the tree as you see fit, and I will call it beautiful. I will teach you how to make pomanders and paper snowflakes, and I will tell you all the best Christmas stories and legends. Our house will be decorated like a wonderland, and people will be jealous of the little boys and girls who get to live in the house with so many lights. We will play Christmas music, and you can cut up old Christmas cards and make collages. SANTA IS REAL. 

Christmas Day
-I promise to take you to your grandparents' house (my parents) and see Santa drive by on the fire truck. I promise we will go to the movies or the beach. The Christmas tree will bulge with your presents. You can open all your presents, eat your candy, and wear your new clothes. This, my babes, is a day for lounging. 

- I promise to wake you up by filling your room with balloons and giving you cake for breakfast. I promise to take you to whichever amusement park you want (unless your birthday is on a school day, then I will throw your class a party and take you to the amusement park on Saturday). 

*These are promises to kids which are still twinkles in Conrad's eye. No fetuses currently occupy my body. 


  1. i loved reading this! especially the last day of school one.
    xx jes, new follower from

  2. how cute is your blog!?


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